Discovering Leticia (My anxiety)

I wake up this morning and to my surprise we are on good terms with Leticia, I know for sure because I have piece of mind. She probably went for a walk or something but this me time I will appreciate. I wanted to explain to you why I decided to name my anxiety but I won't say why I chose the name Leticia. When I got to know that I have anxiety I didn't take it quite well, this was mostly because maybe I didn't want people to treat me like something is wrong with me. I didn't want people to think of me as a "nutcase" because most of the time that's what society sees mental health problems as. So I learned that for people to accept this and for them to understand it better, it was time for me to be familiar with it. Then I can be comfortable talking about it with people and making them aware of what it is, how it affects me but most importantly that it is nothing be scared of or ashamed of. But for one to be familiar with someone you n...

I started realizing that I have a problem back when I was in high school. Where by rather than being out in the streets gallavanting in the streets with my peers getting up to no good, I was pretty much more comfortable being at home laying in my bed reading a book. My mom thought I was just a "nerd" but the truth is that I was really scared. I couldn't go out to face the world alone because I didn't know what will happen or what will people think of me or if I will be able to keep up a conversation for too long. I didn't know what it was called but I knew I had to have a problem because this was nowhere near normal.

The most difficult thing about dealing with Leticia(my anxiety) is the constant overthinking and the fear of the unknown. When I think about it now I’ve always had her for a while but I didn’t know that this is a disorder or what it is called even. But when I think back to most moments in my life, I can see the symptoms and the consistency in my behavior. Living with Leticia is the hardest thing I’ve had to go through in my life and I know that I am not alone because a lot of us have our own personal Leticia’s but we are not aware. It’s the little things like changing your outfit 2 or 3 times before you go for what you usually wear because everything else just doesn’t look good on you and it will make people think you are too thin or too fat. It’s things like making plans with your loved ones and hours before they happen you think “no thanks, I rather stay in bed” and not because you don’t want to go but you don’t know if you can handle being around people for a long time or if y...

I have recently reconnected with Leticia (that’s what I call my anxiety but don’t ask), she was never really gone but went away for a while. You see Leticia and I have the kind of relationship where one is the dominant and the other is submissive but you already know who’s who. Now let me introduce you to her and the type of person she is, I promise you will learn to like her. She is sassy, loud and has a bit of an attitude like I would see an outfit I like and all she will say is “that wouldn’t even look good on you” and I won’t get it because somewhere deep down I think she is always right. She is the honest type of person but way too honest but I promise you she is a nice person. Oh and did I mention that she is jealous? We’ve always been together and it has just been the two of us for a long time. Now imagine me trying to invite someone else into our space, she is having none of that. Leticia is the reason I don’t go out anymore because she doesn’t do crowds, she is the ...